I was pretty much on a first name basis with the staff at the paint counter at Lowes =p
Those little sample jars of paint? Yeah, they pretty much rock!
Cooper's wonderful daddy, hard at work!
Finally done!!
That room was yet another turning point. I couldn't walk past it without stopping and staring. I'd stand in there for the longest time, sunlight streaming in the windows, hands cradling my ever expanding belly, and I would finally allow myself to believe it was real. Soon there would be a little boy in our home using all of those baby things. It turned out it was sooner than I had dreamed. At the time his room was coming together I thought I had nearly three months left until I was to meet my boy but little did I know that it would be less than 8 weeks until I would see the face that would change my entire being.
Shower day!
Maternity Pictures
On November 30th I went to my high risk doctor in Lexington for a routine growth ultrasound. As my pregnancy had progressed I had had several of them as there are often concerns with placenta issues and sometimes growth in Ds pregnancies. It had already been decided that if I made it to 39 weeks gestation, that was it. On this day I was exactly 35 weeks. The night before my appointment I had organized my hospital bag, shaved my legs, and with great difficulty due to my belly, even painted my toes a pretty shade of bright pink. I honestly don’t know exactly what made me do these things. I told myself nothing would come of the appointment and had big plans to do some Christmas shopping afterwards, but somewhere in my subconscious I must have known otherwise.
When I got to my appointment, the ultrasound tech was a new one but very friendly. I knew the drill at this point as I had already been having non-stress tests three times weekly and usually an ultrasound to follow.
One of many non-stress tests during my pregnancy. Oh how he hated the monitor (as evidenced by his kicking at around 14 seconds and again around 1 minute)!
Something was different this time though. The technician was very quiet as she moved the transducer around on my stomach. I wasn't overly alarmed as I had already heard the reassuring swoosh of Cooper's heartbeat but I began to get impatient as the exam table grew more and more uncomfortable! I shifted my weight as my back and hips began to protest, and tried to find relief as I stared at the black/gray/white images on the screen. The silence seemed to grow more pronounced with each rhythmic tic of the clock. Finally, she gave me an artificial smile as she said, "Excuse me just a moment, I'm going to go get Dr. Hansen." I was left alone in the dimly lit room to ponder what was going on. Only moments later the door opened again and the doctor blithely made small talk as she placed the transducer on my belly. In a matter of seconds she was done and was looking at me very seriously and very intently. "I'm seeing that the blood flow to the baby from the umbilical cord is nearly absent. I'm concerned about his lack of movement as well, so I want you to go to the hospital to be placed on the monitor," she said in a very matter of fact tone.
My eyes widened and my throat suddenly felt very dry as I asked, "Am I having a baby today?"
"You very well may be if he doesn't look any better on the monitor...I want you to go straight to the hospital as soon as you leave here."
As had became my custom with this pregnancy I somehow managed to remain calm. I did my best to wipe the ultrasound gel from my pregnant belly and then adjusted my scarf. I thanked them both and said my goodbyes and heading out into the cold November wind. It was then that the enormity of what I had been told hit me and fear set in. I didn't think about the diagnosis or any of the events of the past several months. I just wanted my baby to be okay. A hard lump clogged my throat and hot tears filled my eyes as I lumbered to my car. I called B but got no answer since he was still at work. I left a message on his voicemail telling him not to worry but that I was heading to the hospital, all the while trying my hardest not to cry. Next I called my grandmother who had offered time and again to come with me to my appointment. In a show of trademark stubborn independence (and a desire for unfettered shopping) I had came alone. As the words spilled out explaining what had occurred I began to cry. By this time I was on my way and the traffic around me was blurred by my tears. Her voice breaking with emotion, she did her best to reassure me from 80 some odd miles away, but not without a good scolding for coming by myself. I was at the University of Kentucky Chandler Medical Center within minutes. I lugged my hospital bag out of the back seat and made my way to the shuttle bus that ran from the parking garage to the entrance. I sat and nervously toyed with the zipper on my bag as I tried again to call B. I was triaged, taken to a bed, and hooked up to the monitor. My dad’s brother worked in Lexington at the time and was by my side in no time as the unofficial family phone chain went to work. I’d honestly never considered myself exceptionally close with my extended family, but he sure was a sight for sore eyes, and from then on I’ve tried to make it a point to express my love and appreciation for my wonderful aunts and uncles a bit more. Jerry has always been funny, a joker, and his jovial nature was just what I needed when I had felt so scared and alone.
After what seemed an eternity, I was able to speak to Brandon and he left work and probably broke several traffic laws to make it to the hospital.
Another ultrasound, an IV, and several doctors later it was decided that considering the growth issues, cord flow issues, and decreased movement, it would be best for all involved to go ahead and take the baby. That’s such a strange phrase, isn’t it? Anyway, just like that, a cesarian section was scheduled for 7am the next morning, Thursday December 1st. I breathed somewhat of a sigh of relief and you would think that was the end of the fear and dramatics, but if you'll recall from my very first post ever, Cooper was born at 4:51am...not 7am like it had been scheduled. We had one very scary night to go.
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